It really boils down to effort. Instead of worrying if people were there for me, I started to be there for them not that I didn’t want to before, I just started to see things differently. I figured the more I gave to other people the more I’d get back in return. If I allowed my general concern and care for them to show I figured they’d show me it in return. Instead of being a fair weather friend to them I thought I’d try to talk with them more, not only responding to their messages but also texting them out of nowhere too. If I thought of them I tried to message with them. It quickly started to turn around for me, the friends I had only seen at parties before were turning into friends I went out to lunch with and could talk to regarding personal issues. The saying, “You get what you’ve put in” is extremely accurate in this case. It’s nice to have people as Facebook friends but the more of those people you can cultivate into real life, deep and manful relationships, the better.
I hope I’ll be able to carry this with me when I move to NYC. Living in LA was pretty lonely, I had a few friends but wasn’t able to create what I have here in Fort Wayne. I definitely feel like I got used a lot LA, even by women that I thought were my friends but it turned out they just wanted the followers I had on social media or something and then would disappear. It’s easier to be around people with normal jobs for me because then I know they don’t have any ulterior motives.
My friends here in Indiana love me without question, they accept me for who I am, aren’t embarrassed of me and love to just be around me for me. I’m very fortunate to have such a close knit group of people. After living in LA there’s not a day that goes by that I don’t feel some sort of appreciation for them.